I'm very excited to be done with school. I do have this strange feeling in the back of my mind that I'm not done for good, but I think I am. I have a final paper to finish, an Old Testament exam to take, and pretty much an entire on-line physics class to finish. I feel close. The physics is mostly just word problems like the classic two-trains one.
I think I have a finish-related problem. Whenever I'm close to the end of a project or anything like that I feel this strange desire to stretch it out, almost like I'm afraid of being done for some reason. It doesn't make sense. I feel lazy because of it. I feel like I'm not getting enough done purely because I don't want to get anything completed... I know I have a lot to do after I'm done, but the last step is always hard to make myself take. It's like that with my last paper. It's supposed to be about 10 pages. I have 8 and I know what I need to write to finish it. Why am I writing a blog instead? Because I want to understand why I don't feel like finishing this class, and I hoped that writing about my feelings would help them become clearer to me.
They're not.
I also have a project to finish for work that I am having trouble focusing on. I think that's a little different, though. For some reason when it comes to work and school my brain won't allow me to really focus on both. I can't even really switch between them. If I'm working on a project for work then I neglect my homework. If I'm working on homework I can't seem to add 1 and 1 for work. The simplest things become hard. I think these two problems might be related, but I don't know why or how.
My wife, on the other hand, is a master at finishing things (except food and diet coke cans). She writes well and fast. Well fast. I envy her that. She is so organized and I am trying hard to learn that from her. I do my best to keep the house clean. I've even started washing the dishes even before I'm done cooking. That makes the food cold by the time we eat, but that's the sacrifice I make for cleanliness. Unfortunately cleanliness is not the same as organization. It's part, I'm sure... but whenever my wonderful wife cleans my office I feel like it becomes less organized. I guess I'm not taking this cleanliness thing to heart.
But I digest...
I am going to finish that paper NOW!!!
